I was supposed to reach the gynae's at 8am. Your dad was supposed to pick me up at 730am. He was damn late. What am I going to do with him?
They put me to sleep and when I woke up, you were gone. I felt nothing, just emptiness. It feels strange that when I touch my tummy, you're no longer inside.
I went to your dad's place to rest. But there was no rest. Your dad got into a huge argument with his landlord. I am so tired of all this.
You're making me eat way too much. I'm hungry every 3 hours. But you're making throw up as well. Baby, please don't torment me.
I made an appointment for the abortion for next Wed. I'm really sorry baby, but with a daddy like yours and my anger for him, I don't think I have the strength I need to keep you.
I was so angry with your dad I asked to speak to his mum today. I wanted her to know what her precious son has been doing away from home. She said I have to decide what I want to do with you, that the choice is mine. Does she think that I don't know that? She even passed a comment that this all happened because I was not not using contraceptives, as if your dad need not take any responsibility for that.
I'm very angry with your dad today. He promised to call me everyday while he was there, and I'm alone with you here. He promised I can get him anytime of the day. Yet he went down to the coast without telling me. The coast with no phone reception. Can you believe that?
The appointment with the gynae was at 3pm today. We did an ultrasound, and this was you baby.
When we spoke to the doctor later, he asked if we want to keep you. I got your dad to reply and he told the doctor no. But I spoke to the doctor alone and said I want to think it over. The good doctor gave me till the end of the month to make a decision.
Your dad was pretty nice after the whole checkup. But he still left for Australia that very night for a 10-day holiday.
Today is the day I realise you're in my tummy. The doctor told me it would be most accurate today and so I did the test right after I woke up. Positive. I was in shock for a while. I kept staring at the blue lines. I am a mummy.
I sent a text to your dad. He went into shock, but recovered in time to come and take me to the GP. The GP asked me to keep you and recommended a gynae. I was too confused to think.
After seeing the doctor, your dad and I had a talk in the park. He said he can't have you now. You don't figure in his plans. If I want to keep you, I'm on my own. We made an appointment to see the gynae tomorrow.
